Vegas on the Cheap Day 3- The second best buffet ever and a lesson in “eXcesS”

Day 2 in Vegas started out like most days in Vegas. I woke up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy (ok, sorry for the Ke$ha reference, between the car and the clubs I heard the song close to 100 times, so it’s permanently etched in my brain) After becoming fully conscious- I turned on the TV. I found 15 working channels- of which maybe 6 were watchable in my book. Coupled with that, there was no ESPN Classic, no ESPN2, no Comedy Central and no Travel Channel. This was a travesty, as the NCAA Women’s Selection show was on, and it was of vital importance that I watch it. Just kidding.

After boarding the Deuce, we ventured again to the Strip. This would be a common recurrence. Now, Vegas is known for buffets, and looking for anyway to lose my fitness gains that happened the first part of the semester, I felt it was time to splurge on a buffet. The first of two buffets we sampled was the Flamingo buffet in the Flamingo Hotel. Originally, our plan was to chow on the $3 burger and fries deal the hotel offered, but alas, we were about 12 hours too late. Thanks, graveyard deals.

A watermelon cut in the shape of a flamingo. How creative.

Now, the buffet. For $18, I had a nice fill of food. Fruit cups, key lime pie, fresh cuts of meat, shrimp, penne pasta, and about 30 other items of food that I can’t remember. All I know is that I was full in about 20 minutes. I had also eaten close to four plates of food. The cool part about the buffet was looking out as you were eating and seeing the miniature zoo the hotel had to offer. Complete with little flamingos, turtles, and different kinds of fish, the hotel was one of the many with animals as a feature point of their Vegas experience. After a series of nice little pictures, we were back on the Deuce to the hotel.

I enjoy taking shitty pictures on my phone of cute little animals

Before I go on, I wanted to say that Day 2 in Vegas was my baby brother’s birthday (March 15.) He wanted to make it a point that he can now pick up ladies in his car thanks to his learner’s permit. I am truly shocked he can actually see over the steering wheel.

The birthday boy

Back at the hotel, we descended on the pool, in search of beautiful women and interesting conversation. We got neither. Complete with our whiskey in a Dasani bottle, we managed to sit outside the pool for forty minutes. Terrible idea. Not the whiskey part, but the sitting outside- it was close to fifty degrees. To top it off, we decided to go down the slide in hopes of seeing the aquarium. Nope, wrong again. After our slide runs, we went upstairs, bored and ready for more alcohol.

While primping for the club, I realized something: Pacific Time is awesome. Yes, it’s only two hours behind central time and three hours behind Eastern Standard Time, but I can do so much in those two hours, and NBA games are on much earlier- leaving me more time to do other things. Downside: I missed the Mavs game. Oh well, the Bulls suck anyway.

After spending a grueling amount of time texting club promoters, we got on the list at XS (what is with these names?) the same club our friends were going to join us at. I was so pumped for the $30 cover charge. Not.

I will spare you the details of why, but what happened was unfortunately I went alone. Basically the roommate partied way too hard after multiple hand grenades on Fremont Street courtesy of our awesome bartender Javier. By the way, if you enjoy cheap light shows, Fremont is where it’s at. I have never felt so much pride as an American with a margarita in hand watching a montage to Don McLean’s “American Pie”. To top it off, a woman’s husband standing behind us actually went to Buddy Holly’s last show. Truly awesome. I also thank Binion’s for the 99 cent Nathan’s hot dog that kept me from throwing up at the club.

yes, you would enjoy this too

So, my one-man wolfpack (I had to sneak a Hangover reference somewhere) boarded the Deuce to XS. While on the bus, I had some good conversation with Canadians centering on…. the Olympics of course. Hockey was also a topic, as was CFL football. God bless North Texas wide receivers that currently play for the Saskatchewan Roughriders. (Johnny Quinn)

Now being the idiot that I am, I got off the Deuce three stops too early. Like a good ex-high school cross country runner, I ran to the club. The club is at the Wynn, one of the newest hotels in Vegas. I immediately felt out of place- A. Because I hate clubs and B. My Target apparel was no match for Armani suits and other European designers. Just as I was being let in to the club and about to pay a ridiculous cover charge- the women of Tuscon saved me again. Free into another club. Yipee.

The club was huge, and a nice lesson in excess, sticking to the club name. The dance floor was packed. And a vodka tonic (Don’t judge) was $15.  I’ve never heard so many techno remixes of songs in my life.  In fact I’m sick of techno- time to stick to Robert Earl Keen. This dancing went on for a couple of hours- once we had enough we watched some good gambling courtesy of some Dallas women our age.

Like 1/4 of the dance floor. This place was ridiculous

On a side note, the bathrooms at the Wynn were immaculate. Nicest porcelain toilets I’ve ever sat on. The toilet paper was run of the mill, but the doors of my particular stall felt like a giant ritzy clothes store closet.

Once I finished admiring my stall, I went back to the Aria Hotel. Nice place. Real swanky. Then back to the Nugget. Unfortunately the Deuce was not graced by my presence tonight- I decided to cab it. Day 2 of Vegas finished.


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